I'm Gettin' a Little Misty Here...

Is it just me, or do other guys suddenly find their emotional thresholds drastically lowered once they become parents? I've noticed that ever since Keeley's birth, I'm highly prone to tearing up (as in crying) whenever I hear certain songs, read certain news stories, or watch certain movies or TV shows. For instance, I like country music, but find the old waterworks starting to go when I hear songs about children, God, children and God, or the human condition. (And no, "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk" isn't one of them).

Martina McBride almost had me sending my car off the road one evening coming home from work when I heard her song "In My Daughter's Eyes". And her song "Concrete Angel" is the SADDEST MOTHERFUCKING SONG ever written (it's about a little girl who dies as a result of child abuse).

But boo-hooin' ain't my only thing. When I read about children, esp. toddlers or babies, dying or suffering because of asshole adults who abuse, neglect or abandon them, I get so fucking angry I wanna kill the asshole adults.

I think the fury in me comes right to the top because when I read about these unfortunate children, I see my daughter. And the thought of her suffering in any way tears me apart. It scares me. And being a guy, I counter my fear with rage. It makes me feel like I'm somewhat in control of a world that she's just beginning to experience. On the other end of the spectrum, I tear up when I hear more positive, yet heart-string plucking songs because it's like someone's tapping into the boundless, boundless love I have for my child. It's so big I sometimes think my heart will burst.

OK, I need to get re-grounded here. Someone please fire up "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk" for me.